May 04, 2011

Regrets

Good grief, but my behind is dragging today.  Actually, it has been all week.  It's partly my own stupid fault for staying up too late and partly because I keep getting up every hour or so to see if my kid has made it home safely yet and to use the potty (this getting older thing really sucks at times).  So it's a good thing I've got these writing prompts to rely on, because even with help I had a really hard time coming up with something.


Day 2 prompt:  Something you regret not having done last year.


Regrets?  I've got a few, but when it comes to last year, other than the obvious...."I really regret not dieting and adding more exercise to my life".....a major cop out answer if there ever was one because EVERYONE regrets that, all I can think of is "letting go."  As in letting go of things I can't control. 





I definitely would have been a lot happier last year if I had mastered the art of letting go and letting God run the show.  I wouldn't have worried incessantly about my daughter moving far away or making horrible choices.  I wouldn't have spent so much time pussy-footing around my daughter-in-law out of fear of offending her somehow.  I wouldn't have worried about what my mom thinks about everything we do.  I wouldn't have spent so much time stewing over Tim working such long hours and always being too tired to spend much time with me.

No, if I had mastered the art of letting go, I'd have realized that not one minute of my worry changed a thing and it never will.  I can't control the things others think or do.  All I can control is me.  I can choose to waste my time worrying or I can "let go" and live my life.  Easier said than done when it comes to my family, but I am trying to find that balance between caring and being consumed.  I'm getting better at it...for example, the fact that I can sleep at all when my daughter's out all night (I was 18 once, too, and I know what she might be doing).

6 comments:

quilly said...

You were 18 once and you know what your daughter might be doing. You also know you lived through it and came out an unstanding decent person. You also know how much you resented the adults who tried to interfere.

Now you understand the adults better, but try to connect with that kid in you, too. It might help. (Of course, it might not.) ;)

quilly said...

UPstanding LOL!

Beth Zimmerman said...

Quilly has some excellent points! But I'd still be upset at the all night thing. I don't sleep well when I'm listening for a "kid" to come home!

I'm totally with you on the bad bladder aspects of aging! I finally added an urge incontinence drug (as in "Gotta Go Right Now") to my prescription regimen because I could literally not make it from the realization that I needed to go to the bathroom! I hope you don't get that bad! It sucked!

Stacy Lynn said...

Quilly....The BIG difference being I did those things at college. I would never ever have dreamed of doing them at home or of going against my parents' wishes when I was in their home.

And un-standing might be appropriate. I am really tired.


Beth....It's taken me about a month to be able to sleep at all. At first I stayed up until she got in, which did nothing for my frame of mind or any "conversations" we might have had.

I hope I don't get that bad, either. I could probably eliminate the problem by eliminating caffeine.

quilly said...

As long as I lived in my parental home I was expected to follow their rules, but they enforced that and I would have been evicted for non-compliance. That isn't something your daughter has to worry about, and you know at that age all they care about is themselves. They think that life is NOW and passing them by and have no idea ... but you do -- which is where the conflict comes in.

Stacy Lynn said...

Amen to that! My problem is that I don't really want to give her the boot (though if it ever got unbearable I probably would) and my husband says we will NOT give her the boot, that this will ALWAYS be her home. I agree to some extent, but being part of a household should mean certain responsabilities. She knows we won't kick her out so what else is there but trying to reason?

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