September 16, 2011

Feeling Fragmented

Mommy's Idea

I say this every week, but it just can't be Friday again.  While I appreciate Mrs. 4444 and her efforts on Friday Fragments and love all the visiting back and forth and fun comments from everyone, BUT.....could we please slow this ride down???  I could use an extra few hours or even a day or two in there somewhere.

The weather has changed.  It rained all day yesterday which dropped the temperature.  It's only 38 degrees this morning.  Welcome Fall!  This is my favorite season.  I love the colors, the smells, the tastes, and Football.  I like the shorter days, a cozy fire in the evenings, Halloween and Thanksgiving.  I love it all.  I just hope I get to enjoy some of it.

A good friend of mine at work was fired this week.  She had her third accident in 7 years.  None of them were bad or caused damage and there are other people at work who have had far worse accidents or done worse things...and still have their jobs.  I hate to say it, but I really think our boss was looking for a way to get rid of her.  My friend is a good person with a big heart.  She will do anything for anybody, but....she is also one of those people who knows everything and she isn't afraid to tell you you're wrong.  That is annoying for anyone to put up with, but I don't know any boss that would take it for very long.  She is in her early 60's.  Her husband is in his 70's and in poor health.  They have a mortgage and she has no hospitalization.  She's been driving a school bus for close to 30 years.  This has knocked her for a loop.  I'm worried about her and what she will do.

Tim's aunt's son is getting married tomorrow so we will be going to that.  All the family is going, I guess, though I'm surprised since Tim's aunt once told me we were the only ones from this side of the family her son wanted there.  Maybe the bride-to-be talked him into inviting everyone?  Whatever the case, I'm glad because there will at least be someone to talk to.

I have to confess that I am feeling very discouraged.  I'm exhausted, for one thing, and for the rest....I am working a full-time job, working out at the gym, dieting, trying to keep a home, mentor two newer believers, take two seminary classes and lately our finances are on shakey ground.  The time lost when Tim was sick, the lower pay during his nearly 3 weeks of vacation (only 40 hours, when we are used to a lot of overtime), and my only having unemployment coming in all summer (less than half what I actually make working) have finally caught up with us and our paychecks haven't rebounded yet.  Next week will be the first "normal" checks for both of us.  All the bills are due.  Creditors don't want to hear your sad story.

On top of all that I am feeling very overwhelmed and, well, dumb in my Spiritual Formation class.  I find the answers some of the others are giving to be more than a little intimidating (which I need to get over because part of our grade comes from participation).  I will admit much of my mood probably comes from being tired, but it is getting to me, anyway.

Tim is cranky this morning...and not because he doesn't sleep.  He is back to doing little other than working and sleeping.  I don't know if it's the meds knocking him out now or that the meds don't work or....I don't even know if he is still taking the meds every day.  He is historically, notoriously bad about taking meds.  He messed up his appointment time back at the beginning of the month so now he doesn't see the doctor until the 20th.

Guess it is off to work for me.  I am having to leave earlier in the mornings so I can take Megan to work first and still get to my job on time.


Ellen Stewart (aka Ellie/El/e/Mrs. Seaman) said...

I took a week off from blogging, and it's helped a lot with the exhaustion. I'm not yet missing it...

I'm still tired, but not as much.

As for your formation class? Whenever I feel stupid about God, I think of people who heard of Him and believed in His love for them and loved them right back. You can know everything, but the LOVE is most important. Give yourself a chance to learn. Besides you're way more booksmart than I am!

Michelle said...

I believe Autumn is my favorite season also.
I love the colors, smells and cozy clothes.
But then again I like the newness of Spring. When everything comes alive.

Stacy said...

Ellen...Thank you for the encouragement. I'm still posting, but (shame on me) I've not really been reading everyone else's blogs. I post so people don't forget I'm hear, but not sure that's working anyway. It seems like everyone's abandoned me lately. LOL I'm more book smart than you?? Where'd you get THAT idea?

Michelle...I'd like Spring, too, if it came without the mud. It's always so wet in this area and with Tim in construction he comes home covered in mud, which always seems to end up trailed through the house.

The Crazy Coxes said...

Fall is my favorite time of year too...for all the reasons you listed.
I hope things start smoothing out a little bit. You are doing an awful lot. Your plate is full. I hope you have a little bit of time to sit back and do nothing or do something that requires low effort and is enjoyable. Enjoy the weekend!

That corgi :) said...

I feel for your friend who got fired; I can't imagine being her age, working those many years and then now wondering what to do.

Life does have a way of getting overwhelming at times and add to the mix the frustrations of finances; I can only hope you have a restful weekend!



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