December 31, 2011

New Year's Eve

I'm sitting here in the big brown chair, Tim's usual perch, beside the Christmas tree lit for the last day before it comes down tomorrow, going back into boxes and Rubbermaid containers until Christmas 2012.  Unless the Mayans were right and it's the last time ever.  I'm watching Julie & Julia on Lifetime.  I've wanted to see it forever and with Megan still in bed and Tim out working on the church building....I am in control.  I am all powerful.  I rule the remote!

Julie & Julia finds it's start when Julie Powell is about to turn 30 and a "friend" features her in an article about the lost generation and depicts her as floundering and not living up to her potential.  There are those who would think that description fits me and there are days I am inclined to agree.  Julie, a frustrated writer, turns to blogging to find her voice.  Her topic is cooking.  Specifically, french cooking in the style of Julia Child.  She determines to cook her way through Julia's entire cookbook in a year.

That searching for a voice is familiar territory.  It's why we all blog, I'd guess.  Some find their voice right away and meet with success.  Some never do.  And some, like me, just keep plugging along hopping to get it right one day.

Can you tell the movie, the ending of one year and beginning of a new year, and my own age and circumstances are turning my thoughts inward today?

Nothing has really changed in my life as the year comes to a close.  With a 19-year-old daughter still at home (well, she sleeps here most of the time and eats here some of the time) I'm still hanging right on the edge of the empty nest.  Not quite there, but pretty much relieved of mothering duties just the same.  At 47 I'm taking those first tentative steps into middle-age (I still remember when that seemed so very far away).  I married and began having my children young and sometimes, I admit I feel like I missed out on a lot of the fun times my friends were having in their 20's and feel like I have a bit of making up to do.  I am ready, I guess, for excitement and adventure now that keeping the homefires burning is not the be-all and end-all of my life.

This is really a rambling post with no real purpose.  Sorry for that.  There is just the need to get this stuff out of my head....and writing is how I've always done that.

What I'm thinking for the blog in the coming year is to just continue to write about life.  My life, specifically.  I'm just going to keep plugging on to figure out what is next.  What I'm going to do in and with this stage of life, which I have been assured is now the best season in a woman's life.  Not at all like life for women just two generations ago.  I am the same age my grandmother was when I was born and I remember her as an old woman my whole life.  I am not old.

I took my first seminary class this past year.  Are there more in store this coming year?  I can't say for sure.  I haven't decided, but I proved I can do it.  I did a 3-month program with a trainer at the gym.  I can't afford  to keep seeing a trainer (the 3-months were a special and heavily discounted deal), but again, I proved I can do it, so eating healthier and exercising are on the table.

On the blogging front, expect more on the lessons I am learning from reading (and living) Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts.  I, along with a few of my friends, have decided that one of the main goals of this year will be to learn to be intentionally grateful.  To learn to live in the present moment, the here and now, the small, seemingly insignificant minutes.

Unfortunately, I could continue to blather on about nothing here for a good while, but I'll spare you.  I need to get started on the preparations for tonight.  We are having just a couple of friends over to welcome in the new year....and even though Julie & Julia has me wanting to try my hand at gourmet cooking tonight is not the night.  LOL  It's the standard (for these parts) hotdogs and keilbasa with sourkraut, shrimp, and a regular buffet of snacky-type stuff (feel that, it was Julia rolling over in her grave).

Go, enjoy your own celebrations.  Love your families, embrace your friends, appreciate yourself and the gift you are.  May 2012 be full of the blessings of health, love, and happiness for you and yours.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2 comments:

Marti said...

Wishing you and yours a peaceful and happy new year.

Stacy said...

Thanks, Marti!

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